Writing “Christian Mythology” was a very long process. The last five years of that effort caused something to happen to me which I can only see in hindsight now. I am just beginning to emerge from the clutches of something I did not expect.
As a writer, I never understood until now what other writers meant when they said that many times they “became” some of the characters in their books. I think of poor Heath Ledger the actor. He became the Joker and it literally killed him. The villain was so dark and lived just to see other people burn. In “Christian Mythology” I became the darkest of all that this book railed against. While I did not take on its teachings, I took on a persona just as negative, wrong, and ungodly. The strange thing is, I remember praying about this so much, asking God to show me the truth, to live the truth, and write it. I never dreamed He would do it by exposing the absolute worst in me just as I had brought to light the worst in the kingdom. This was not God’s payback. It was His mercy.
Since I finished the manuscript I have been miserable. Despair has been my constant companion. The state of God’s Bride is horrible, blemished, and stained with sin. God showed me that I am no different. I cried out to Him asking why? Why save me, why go through all this, if I am to remain a miserable wretch?
I wanted to jump right in to completing the sequel to “Christian Mythology”. While this manuscript talked all about what is wrong with the Church, its sequel “The Remnant” talks all about what is right with the Church and what we, the Bride, should be doing as a Body in these last days. I asked God to have me live this reality just as powerfully as He did with the first book. Oh if I only realized what I had asked for, perhaps I would not have been so foolish. The misery and despair only got worse.
I am convinced now more than ever of the simplicity of the gospel. The blood of Jesus afforded me two things: freedom from sin and death, and; reconciliation with God my Father. I will sum this up in just a few verses. The reconciliation part means that God redeemed me back to the relationship He wanted with His creation in the beginning. That is what Jesus prayed for in John 17. Since sin separated us in the first place, it is sin that I must now die to and stay dead to. That is my responsibility as God says throughout Romans. The indwelling Holy Spirit of salvation gave me that power. Specifically, Romans 6:11 claims this simplicity. Romans 7 declares the difficulty. Romans 8 proclaims the victory.
Go and sin no more. That is a glorious life.